Self #2: The Blamer

If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself that you are not poet enough to call forth its riches…

–Rainer Maria Rilke

The Blamer

The Blamer is my second-most vituperative Self, trailing only The Pity-Seeker.

Whereas The Pity-Seeker melts hearts and evokes concern with teary, puppy-dog eyes, The Blamer hurls thunderbolts.

He rages—oh, how he rages!—against everyone and everything.

My genetic inheritance, my upbringing, the Universe, God (whose existence he doubts, but why relinquish such a juicy target for indignation?)—all are fair game.

He fears two things above all else:

a) Introspection: He cannot bear the inward gaze—it reveals him.

b) Surrender: He loathes the cessation of denunciation—it starves him.


look within and stop asking why things unfold the way they do.

That’s it.

When I look within, I see The Blamer and give him the space he needs—a need that cannot be accurately assessed without tuning in.

When I stop asking why, I can hear The Blamer clearly and attend to him, as a host should.

Eventually, like the others, he tires of wailing and drops wearily back into his seat.

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